BSNL and a bottle of cyanide

‘Is this BSNL, the Indian telephone company?’

“Yes indeed, what else would this be?”

‘Ok okay, I have a problem in the land line and so..’

“Then how come you are able to talk to me on the land line?’

“See actually you are right, I meant to say that the land line is okay but the broadband..”

“Say clearly, what is your problem?”

‘Oh yes, the land line is not the problem but what happens is..”

‘Mister, can you tell me what your problem is? I have other works to attend to’.

“Oh yes, sorry, you have many things to do. I agree, so please let me complete..”

‘See Mister, you are wasting time. What is your problem?”

“My problem is that the land line that I am speaking to you in has a problem …”

“What ? You said there was no problem with the land line? C’mon, don’t’ waste my time..”

‘Sorry Sir, I don’t know where to begin, well, actually the problem is that the land line connection is pretty good and while connecting to the internet..”

“Hello, when the land line connection is good, then why are you calling us for?”

‘Well, the land line is good but the broadband internet has a problem and that is why I ..”

“Come to the point, your broadband internet has a problem, right?”

‘Absolutely correct Sir, how did you find that out?”

‘Well, Mister, we have been in this line for the last many years and we know. Ok what is the issue?’

“That is what I thought I told you Sir, the broadband connection doesn’t work”

“Okay, the broadband is the problem. Fine. Did you check the modem?’

“Well I saw all the lights go on and off from time to time yet nothing works”.

“Wait, don’t be in a hurry. You are mixing things. Check your modem first. Do all the lights glow?”

“Yes, but that is when the computer is shut off. Until then the modem lights don’t glow in unision”.

‘So your problem is that the lights in the modem don’t glow together. Does the modem work?”

‘Well, as I said, the lights glow at random when the computer is on and I wait for over 30 minutes. And by the time I lose patience and switch-off the computer, the lights in the modem begin to glow together’.

“Now I get it, Your problem is not the line, nor the modem but your computer. So when you switch-off the computer , the lights of the modem glow in unison and express solidarity with one another and the moment you switch on the computer, the lights in the modem decide to go on a strike, right?”

“Fantastic Sir, how wonderfully put, my tribulations with the modem! Really I must commend you on your ability to decipher the issue”.

“See Sir, that is why we are here, to serve the public. Now your problem is solved right?”

“Yes, I believe so. The problem is the computer. If I need my broadband to work, then I need to switch off the computer and vice versa. Excellent solution Sir, Thank you”.

“You are welcome, is there anything else that I can assist you with?”

“Oh yes , could you tell me where I could get a bottle of cyanide?”

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4 thoughts on “BSNL and a bottle of cyanide

  1. Here is my experience when I approached BSNL for a Data Card(SIM) for my IPAD.

    Counter 1 (Enquiry) : Madam I need a Data card for my IPAD.
    Madam in Enquiry : Go to that Counter

    Second Counter: Madam I need a Data Card for my IPAD.
    Madam: What IPAD?

    Yes, IPAD.

    Madam: What is the name of the phone?

    IPAD madam.

    We have no Data card for IPAD. Go to AE there.

    Sir, I need Data card for my IPAD.

    Go to that Counter.

    Sir, but she only directed me to you.

    OK, what do you want?

    Sir I need a Data card for my IPAD.

    What IPAD?

    Yes Sir, IPAD.

    Who is making that?

    Apple.

    But Apple is making only IPhone.

    Apple is making IPAD also.

    I have to see the unit, then only I can say.

    Thank you Sir,

    I walked off and visited a Private Service Provider. Within 15 minutes, I received the Data Card (SIM) and another 4 hours, they spoke to me confirming my name and address. They activated the SIM Card.

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  2. BSNL HAS NO W/L!!! YOU KNOW HOW NO FRESH APPLICATION FOR NEW CONNECTION IS RECD UNLESS AND UNTIL THE LINEMAN IN THAT AREA GIVESCLEARANCE TO THE CGM!!! VERY SAD STATE OF AFFAIRS. IT IS ONLY A QUESTION OF TIME WHEN BSNL IS WOUND UP

    Like

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